The dream, the phone call and the teasel root tincture

Emotionally and energetically healing from early stage Lyme.

Today is day 27 of my early Lyme journey. Click here if you want to read more about what has been happening previously. I haven’t been feeling so well lately but considering I am now into week two of the antibiotics (and I started taking them within three weeks of discovering the tick bite), I think it is just a question of getting through it as best I can, however, I wanted to write a post today in order to go over some feelings I have had about the emotional side of healing and how important it is.

The night before last, I had a very vivid dream where I was in a city appartment with a friend and I was looking in every cupboard for something really important; I was due to go off to college that morning and I knew I had to have this certain thing for the day and my friend was helping me look for it. We never found what it was I was looking for in the dream but yesterday evening, out of the blue, my friend called me for a chat. I was thinking, no way! this is crazy – he is actually an expert forager, herbalist and intuitive and when I told him I had early stage Lyme, he replied that he had just made up some Teasel Root tincture and could post it to me the next day. I now knew exactly what it was I was looking for.

We discussed my dream at length; he asked me more questions about how it felt emotionally and about some other details of the appartment and I told him that it was a very safe space to be in, with soft colours, big floor cushions and a lovely cat. There was however, a lot of clutter in the cupboards and it made me feel quite stressed searching through them. We talked about the fact that over the past couple of weeks, I had been preoccupied with my thinking brain running on full power ‘research mode’ looking for treatments for my physical symptoms on the internet (signified by cluttered cupboards), seeing doctors etc. and that night, my subconsciousness had (at last) taken over and guided me into this safe space to ask for help in finding something my energetic body needed for healing. And it just so turned out that he had made the tincture already for me; I would not ony benefit from a powerful, wild-crafted remedy (used specifically in the treatment of Lyme) but I knew that the energy sent through the plant – via his healing hands – into that bottle had been tailor-made for me.

Today, I have been through a dramatic shift in awareness. After quite a turbulent night, I woke up feeling very calm and I was able to slow down and even stop my habitual thoughts, which normally seem to flood into my head as soon as I wake. I became open to my body and it started to become ‘larger’ – I am not sure if this is the correct word to describe it but in a strange kind of way, it became more powerful. I had the sense that my body could tap into ‘Unlimited Wisdom’ to defend itself against the Lyme bacteria, if only I would stop overriding it with incessant (worrying) thoughts and feeding it with complicated information; stuff that up until now, I ‘thought’ was the best thing I could be doing to help.

I also realised that here I was, already living in my safe space; I had created a real-world equivalent of that appartment – with its soft colours and floor cushions – in my own home and I had already ‘designed’ my life so that I could avoid crowds and noise and unsettling things like travel (which I find very hard to cope with) and can be absolutely at peace and settled. This realisation has come as a blessing to me; there’s no need to desire to be somewhere else or want something more than I have already; all I need to do now is concentrate on reconnecting and reintegrating with my energetic Self.

Clearing my mind of extraneous clutter is what I am going to be concentrating on in the next few days, if not weeks; letting the innate ‘power’ of my body fully grow back to its former strength (before my incessant thinking patterns took over, probably sometime soon after I started school at the age of 5). I realise that there is nothing else I need to be doing at this point; there’s no complicated procedure I need to work over, absolutely no mental process involved – I just need to let go and stay in the present moment, where all this Knowledge already lives. I am of course, not going to give up on the antibiotics, the supplements, the detox or the diet as I know that everything has had (and will continue to have) a part to play in all of this but right now, I feel it is time to trust that my body will do what it has to do in order to fight, if I give it the chance.

The dream, the phone call and the teasel root tincture has reconfirmed my faith in the Universe, where everything is connected and healing is totally possible within the energetic/psychic field. It is also the place where I can communicate with animals and Spirits and this is where my future ‘work’ will lie, so it makes sense to dive deeply into it as soon as I can.

A Wolf

I have been feeling a little bit of relief since finding out that Juno probably, more than likely, was suffering from Lyme disease for a few years before her death. This means that although the decision to put her to sleep was probably not the best outcome at the end of the day, at least I now know the reason for her aggression and that it was not because she was a ‘bad dog’ or was totally uncontrollable/untrainable. She was amazing with her family; protected us to the very end and only saw red with other dogs, which we tried to keep her away from as much as possible. Her behaviour was totally baffling but knowing she probably had Lyme disease makes it perhaps a little more easier to understand. I still feel much sadness, guilt and dismay that neither I nor the vets had picked up on this very simple diagnosis and was able to treat her. I am starting to feel a little better, however; so much so, that the depression I had been feeling has lifted and the crying I had been doing on a daily basis has stopped. I feel more ‘settled’ in my own skin and the pain is subsiding.

A few nights ago, I had the strangest dream; it was so real, it actually felt as if what occurred actually happened. I don’t often have dreams like this but when I do, I feel very affected by them for a long time afterwards and I know that they have a huge significance in my life. I was ‘awoken’ by a feeling that something was coming towards me. I heard a voice say ‘a dog’ and got the impression that there were a few people/beings present in the room watching me. I turned and realised that a huge wolf had just lay down by my right side. He was silver and black and was nearly as long as me and his presence was very scary. His head was right next to mine and his massive back arched above me. I had the urge to turn back over and get away from him, whereupon he switched over to my left side and lay down there. I half-woke up shortly after that in a sweat, feeling scared because of the vividness of it all, thinking it was a nightmare. Quite soon, when I had settled down a bit, I went back to sleep.

As I woke up again for the morning, I immediately recalled the dream and understood that it was Juno coming back to lie down in the place she always liked to be in; stretched out right next to me. She was now a wolf, a big (in fact huge) wolf. I also understood that this was the reincarnation she had been looking forward to during her life with us. I then had an image of her running wild in a deep forest with a pack of wolves and it made me feel very proud in bittersweet way. This is what she had wanted, I knew without doubt. I had the feeling that she had now served her ‘purpose’ with me and my family and as soon as I had found out the cause of her aggression, Lyme, six months after her death, she left. I often would hear the words ‘set me free’ when I thought she was nearby and now I know that this was what she wanted more than anything.

Since then, I have had images of her leading the pack as the Alpha Male. I know that she is a beautiful, strong, intelligent, fierce and loyal leader and will have great success with her pack, which I get the impression is far away from human habitation. I feel a such a release; happier than I have been in the last six months and so very glad that at last, she is free.

When I was pregnant with my first daughter almost exactly 17 years ago, the night before I gave birth, I had the impression that a wolf was sitting at the bottom of my bed, there to look over me whilst my daughter was being born. I had never felt anything so real since my childhood visions of wolves pacing up and down outside my bedroom door (yes it seems to be a recurring theme and boy, did they seem real back then). When my second daughter was born, nearly 14 years ago, on a snowy December night, I heard a fox screech continuously outside the window. I now wonder if these are all one and the same creature; a reincarnation of many wolves and foxes all linking to my real dog companion (and protector) Juno. I have the feeling that they are.

I will still always be in contact with Juno; with the wolf that now roams that deep forest somewhere far away. The connection can never be broken and maybe, just maybe one day in the future my beloved will send me another dog or even a real wolf to look over me again.

I look forward to that day.

My (early) Lyme protocol in detail

A day-by-day diary of my experience.

Here are the details of the progression of the tick bite I first noticed on my leg on 12th September 2019, (which I probably picked up from a walk on 7th Sept, when I went through some low undergrowth and was infected almost certainly by 9th Sept which I take as: Day 1) and what I did day by day* to treat it, just in case you have been searching for information on what to do with a bite you ‘suspect’ is a tick. I will continue to update this page as time goes by and symptoms change/lessen and I add new treatments and protocols (if needed):

Tick bite progression (in photos):

Tick bite protocol (day by day):

Day 3: I first saw a rather angry red blotch on the lower half of my leg (photo 1). I never saw an attached tick during the days running up to this, so I dismissed the mark as a spider bite because I had been spending a lot of time in the garden (in shorts) around that time. I took antihistamines for the next two days but they did not seem to make any difference at all.

Day 7: I had a realisation that the red blotch could be from a tick. I knew that I had been on a walk about 11 days before that and had walked through some undergrowth but I am always carfeul to check for ticks (as we live in deer country) and obviously, had not seen anything on me at the time. The mark was not going away and looked angrier than ever, which I thought was rather strange. I was feeling fine but I started to keep a very close eye on it, spending several hours on the internet researching photos of tick rashes, both classic and unusual.

Day 9: I made an appointment at the doctors. By this time I had researched all I could on tick bites, bullseye rashes, non-bullseye rashes etc. and I just was not sure if it was a spider bite or not. The blotch had become a little bigger and the centre was turning blue (photo 2) so I thought it only safe to get it checked out. I was still feeling absolutely fine, no ‘flu or headaches or joint stiffness, which the doctor informed me may come later on. She also was very unsure that it was actually a tick bite and because I have a history of IBS, she was not keen to start antibiotics unless it was very clear it was from a tick and was not resolving itself. She told me to wait a week and if it had not gone away, to come back and she would prescribe antibiotics (I really did NOT want to take antibiotics!). The doctor suggested I draw a line around the mark to see if it was spreading (photo 3). I came away from the appointment feeling cheerful; if she was unsure, then perhaps it was only a spider bite after all🤞🏻.

Day 13: started Astragalus and Japanese Knotweed. The bite had got slightly better, the edge had grown by about 1 cm but the central area was getting smaller and turning blue, which I thought was a very good sign (photo 4). Even so, I wanted to be proactive whilst I was waiting to see if I needed to return to the doctors. I had already read Stephen Harrod-Buhner’s books on Plant Intelligence and Fasting a few years back and knew that he had written a book on treating Lyme naturally, so I turned to his protocol to see if there was anything I could take immediately. He suggests Astragalus (1,000mg x3 per day) for new tick bites (as soon as a bite is detected and for a month after that). In addition to this, because I thought I needed an antioxidant boost, I started taking Japanese Knotweed supplements (250mg x3 per day) also from the Buhner protocol. The bite calmed down a lot after I started taking these supplements (photo 6) and I was feeling good about the whole situation, thinking that it probably was not a tick bite after all.

Day 20: started Antibiotics and Saccharomyces Boulardii. This morning, I noticed that the bite had changed; it looked redder again and a ring of blotches had separated from around the central point (photo 8). I hadn’t really noticed the rash expanding out into a defined circle of spots until now. It was not the classic Lyme bullseye but near enough (godammit). I figured that the Astragalus must have broken up the infection somewhat, so it hadn’t formed a complete ring but even so, this was NOT a good sign. At this point, I was under no illusions that I could treat this myself. I went back to the doctors for the antibiotics (Amoxicillin 500mg x3 per day for 14 days) that afternoon and also got a prescription for S. Boulardii (200mg x1 per day) to help my gut cope with the onslaught of drugs. When I got home, I researched some more and ordered some extra supplements to help me get through the trauma of the strong antibiotic regime and for some extra help against the Lyme infection itself.

Day 23: started NAC and Nattokinase. I found out that in order for the antibiotics to get right into all the nooks and crannies that the Lyme maybe hiding in, I needed to take a biofilm disruptor. There is evidence to show that when certain bacteria are attacked they can go into a dormant state and hide themselves in an ‘alginate’ layer that can be found in various places in the body, so that later, when the body is clear of antibiotics, the bacteria can become active again. I have sensitive guts and chronic rhinitis, so I know that I more than likely already have active biofilms inside me, so I started taking NACN-Acetyl Cysteine (600mg x3 per day) and Nattokinase (500mg x3 per day) to disrupt them. This was on day four of the course of antibiotics, when I also found out that the mitochondria in the cells of the body may start to get damaged. Fortunately, NAC is also a very powerful antioxidant (along with Japanese Knotweed), which has been shown in clinical trials to protect these mitochondria, so I started taking it specifically for this dual purpose. For the first time, the rash on my leg was showing signs of disappearing (photo 10); the central mark had become much smaller and nearly all of the outer blotches had faded. One side of my throat started to become uncomfortable and I knew that this was more than likely a swollen lymph node.

Day 25: I had begun to have diarrhoea at this point, so I upped my intake of Saccharomyces Boulardii to 200mg x2 per day. I started massaging essential oils into my throat to help drain my lymph nodes (grapefruit, rosemary and ginger) and it gave me some temporary relief. I was starting to feel the effects of the antibiotics and just wanted to rest; I was so wiped out (I knew that this would be the case). I felt very below parr, with added intermittent kidney pain, nausea and headaches. I started dry skin brushing to try and help the toxins move through my body I also did a coffee enema to support my liver and flush out my bowels. The marks on my leg continued to diminish; the central spot was now turning blue and was drying up with the outer blotches continuing to fade (photo 11). At no point in the 23 days had the bite become swollen, itchy or had throbbed, it had only felt hot to the touch.

Day 27: I reached a bit of a low point; cancelled some plans for the next week and just wanted to rest. My intestines were still all over the place but I believed the extra dose of S. Boulardii was helping keep the diarrhea at bay. The bite mark looked much better today though, so that was a relief (photo 12). I increased the coffe enemas to x2 per day and was massaging my neck regularly with the essential oils. I spoke to my doctor about the lymph node swelling, as I was concerned that it was an indication of Lyme spreading throughout my body but she believed it to be just a secondary infection that would resolve itself with the antibiotics. At this point, I was still taking the Amoxicillin, Nattokinase, Astragalus and Japanese Knotweed all at x3 per day, the S. Boulardii at x2 per day and because I had been suffering from nausea on and off for the last few days, I decided to reduce the NAC to x2 per day for the time being.

Day 29: today was definitey the worst so far. I now had a full-blown cold (I couldn’t call it ‘flu). This is another one of early Lyme’s classic symptoms. Thankfully though, my lymph nodes had returned almost back to normal. I felt very sick throughout the day; bone broth seemed to alleviate the nausea for a while and I was down to eating scrambled egg and a bit of coconut yoghurt. The previous night I felt my skin crawling as I fell asleep and I even had to get up again to check myself for more ticks, even though I had not even ventured out onto the lawn for a couple of weeks! I had a call out of the blue from a friend who is a herbalist and as it happened, he had just made up some Teasel Root tincture, which he would send to me straight away.

Day 30: the cold continued. The morning was tough. I dragged myself into town to stop at the market and go to the pharmacy again. I had been listening to a podcast about Bach Flower Remedies for animals and decided to get some for myself. I chose Elm – ‘at times there may be periods of depression when you feel that the task you have undertaken is too difficult, and not within the power of a human being‘ and Pine‘even when successful you think that you could have done better, and are never content with your efforts or the results’ – those were the ones that resonated most with me and seemed to fit in with what I was going through emotionally right then. I sat in the car and took them straight away and I have to say, they made me feel better within minutes. I had gone from the most brutal to the most ethereal of treatments (and everywhere in between) over the past few weeks and these essences seemed to just take the edge off the anxiety and stress that I realised had been building up during this time. I also started to add some detox measures to my protocol with some chlorella (x10 200mg tablets per day), epsom salt baths (x1 per day) and a glass of lemon juice and water (x3 per day). I was also still continuing with all the medicine listed on day 27 and the coffee enemas (x2 per day).

to be updated again soon ….

Other things I did during this time:

During this time, I also changed some elements of my diet and lifestyle, which I feel I should mention. I immediately came off all forms of sugar (sucrose, fruit, honey, maple syrup, sweetners etc.) when I started taking the antibiotics. I figured that sugar would only encourage opportunistic (bad) bacteria to colonise my gut and I wanted to avoid this at all costs. I had already been on a FODMAP diet for six months, so I made sure I stuck to this diet impeccably. I had always been in the habit throughout the year of full-body sunbathing for about 20 minutes on the days we had some sun, so I made sure I continued with that too. I read that antibiotics can increase your sensitivity to the sun so I stayed out for only 15 minutes or so (it was autumn so the sun was much weaker than normal). I started drinking bone broth everyday, to help heal my intestines (with added miso) and made sure I ate homemade sauerkraut for the beneficial probiotics.

*Please do not take any of this as bone fida medical advice. I decided to start with these herbs after many hours of research on the internet; making sure to read the findings of experts who have done thousands of hours of research (such as Stephen Buhner). Before you start on any regime, please do your own research into each supplement and always buy from a reputable manufacturer. I have no idea if any of this is helping, although I’d like to believe it is; in fact, I am making it my business to believe it is. I would never have refused the antibiotics – as my alternative practitioner told me – ‘don’t start playing a mental torture game’ and he was right. Save yourself the stress and realise that allopathic medicine has a crucial part to play in infections of this kind and I was definitely going to do everything I could to minimise the chance of contracting Lyme, period. Stephen Buhner advises that antibiotics should always be seriously considered as treatment alongside his protocol.

I believe that my ’emotional protocol’ was just as important as the ‘physical protocol’ and I made sure that I lived as mindfully as I could during my recovery, this included spending time outdoors with animals, birds and plants, meditating and trying to keep away from social media, TV and EMF sources as much as possible. Please also understand that the Buhner protocol (and others) is very different if you are suffering from late-stage Lyme – for instance, Astralagus is contra-indicated for this phase of the disease, so please make sure you do your own research if your circumstances are in any way different from mine and make sure you talk to an alternative health practitioner/functional medicine/lyme literate doctor for ongoing support.